Gosh, can’t believe its week 17. MKMMA is such a wonderful journey and deep inside I do feel like a hero taking this journey. The commitment to the time, reading, watching webinars and the constant acts of repetition takes dedication. But at this period in my life coming up the pike to 61 years, I am committed to completing and crossing the finish line for once in my life. Today is not a good day, the budda seems to be really kicking and punching me. I am trying hard not to give in to Budda Monster but to substitute the thoughts and feelings with a positive ones. This is a challenge today, but I am doing it, I have my cards out in front of me. Now I have to tackle my stack of index cards, the accomplishments, the gratitudes and the mini journals.
Permission: Giving myself permission seems to be last on the list. It should be first. I don’t think the Budda Monster knows how to raise his hand for permission. But the task at hand is WHO CARES about Budda Monster, he needs to move out of the neighborhood…NOW! I need to believe in myself that permission exists. So therefore for yesterday and today that are difficult times, I am giving myself permission to grieve over my issues, but in the same thought thank the universe for the journey and experience that I had and wipe the tears. Geeze I haven’t cried in a very long time. Today the fountain of tears they are a flowing.